So, China offers something wonderful called McDelivery™. (According to others, there is no delivery charge, but we ended up paying 8元. Maybe there’s an exception we don’t know about.)
Basically, you can order either online or over the phone (English available for both), and within 45 minutes (it took, like, 20 for us), the deliciously unhealthy food will arrive. Ordering McDonald’s for a late lunch/early dinner during today’s Chinese review session (really just hanging out and procrastinating as much as possible) was quite the experience.
We had heard that ordering delivery was possible but not exactly how. So, we turned to Google. I encountered an all-Chinese McDonald’s website, but after maneuvering through the site largely by looking at the web addresses since they were the only things in English, I found a page with “English” at the top. Score. Soon enough, we three knew what we wanted and placed our orders online.
After waiting a few minutes, I tracked the order online and was shocked when after only two minutes, the status said that our order was “in transit.” How the…?
Three minutes later, I receive a call from the driver. No. Way. It was the delivery man.
Me: Uh, hello? [while shaking my head in disbelief and laughing at the incredible speed]
DM: Ni [insert rapid Mandarin] … zai … [more rapid Mandarin] … shenme lou?
Me: Uh, women zai Wudong Lu…
DM: Dui, zai Wudong Lu … [still not entirely comprehensible Mandarin] shenme lou?
Me: Ah [finally understanding] zai 16 lou.
DM: Hao de, [something about how he’ll call again when he arrives]
Needless to say, my Mandarin needs some serious work. After waiting about ten more minutes, I receive another call.
Me: Um, hello? Ni hao? [how the heck do I answer a phone?]
DM: Wei? [oh, right.] Wo dao le. [or something…]
Me: Ah, okay. Uh. Wo xianzai qu…shit. [laugh embarrassingly then hang up]
My friend and I rush downstairs in hungry anticipation, only to be met with disappointment when all we saw was rain and a taxi driving up with other international students inside. I call him again.
Me: Ni zai nar? [pretty sure this is the rudest way possible to ask where someone is]
DM: [what basically was gibberish to me]
Me: Um. Ni zai nar? [somehow, I thought repeating the same question would help]
DM: [probably repeated what he just said]
Me: Uhhhhh, ni zai 16 lou ma?
DM: Bu zai [explains where he actually is but still can’t understand]
Me: Ummmmm [looking frantically at my friend], ne keyi zou… [ask my friend how you say enter…she doesn’t know. Screw this] Ni keyi deng yixia ma?
I made an executive decision. We would go back upstairs, get our coats, and go to the front gate, where the delivery man probably was. And he was. After apologizing profusely (duibuqi! duibuqi!), I finally give him the 97元 and returned with our yummy food.
What an adventure. Chinese class starts tomorrow—and after these past few days of some real-world Chinese testing, I really don’t know what to think. Friends say they’re glad that I’m around because I actually try to speak in Chinese with locals and can help. But when it comes down to it, my Chinese really is quite pitiful.